BREAKING: We’re Running Out of Time to Stop Global Warming

We’ve got breaking news here, people: the world is running out of time to stop global warming.

This is a new breaking news story that is really important this time and not yet another ridiculous hoax from the Jews.

Also, forest fires are caused by global warming somehow. It’s science or whatever.

The Guardian:

World leaders are running out of time to forge a green recovery from the Covid-19 crisis, with only a year to go before a crunch UN summit that will decide the future of the global climate, leading experts have warned.

Progress on a green recovery, which would reduce emissions while repairing the damage from the pandemic, has been hampered by the need for an emergency rescue of stricken economies around the world and the resurgence of the coronavirus in Europe, the US and some other countries.

But with global heating showing no sign of slowing, and the danger signals of climate breakdown increasingly evident – from the Arctic ice to American wildfires – the race is on to build the global economy back better.

Ban Ki-moon, former UN secretary-general, told the Guardian: “It is important to build back the economy but if we do not keep global temperature rises below 1.5C this will create a huge, huge problem. Cities and countries across the world may simply cease to exist in a 3C world [which is where current climate commitments would lead]. So we must redouble our efforts before we pass the point of no return.”

Do you understand what it is going to mean if we pass the point of no return?

Let me tell you: it’s going to mean that it will be hot all the time, and you will just be sweating constantly. You’ll have to take a shower and change your shirt like, three times a day. And your ass is going to be a constant swamp. Just swamp ass, 24/7/365.

That is the threat: the threat is complete swamp ass because it is going to be so hot all the time.

Furthermore: your pits are gonna be stank.

What’s more: swamp ass and arm pit stank have been shown to disproportionately affect disenfranchised minority communities.

We used to think that the seas were going to rise and flood everyone, but it turned out that was a total hoax. But I will tell you this: when your ass is a swamp all day, every day, you’re going to be wishing the seas would flood just to wash the sweat from your ass-crack.