June 8, 2017
I don’t usually defend deranged brown savages. But I’m going to right now.
UFC fighter War Machine has been sentenced to life in prison for assault and battery, which is insane in itself.
This is a situation where one person beat another person’s ass. Pretty badly, okay. But that was all it was – an ass beating. There was no attempted murder. Somehow there are 29 felony convictions, and I don’t even understand what that means – this was a single incident of someone getting their ass kicked.
But on top of the nuttiness of “giving someone an ass beating” resulting in life imprisonment – the bitch deserved it, and no one anywhere can make an argument that she didn’t.
A US mixed-martial arts combatant known as War Machine has been jailed for life for kidnapping, and sexually assaulting his former girlfriend in 2014.
Jonathan Paul Koppenhaver was found guilty in March of attacking Christy Mack and her friend Corey Thomas after accusing them of having an affair.
Ms Mack suffered a fractured eye socket and nose, broken ribs and lost teeth.
In a statement to the court Koppenhaver expressed remorse, attributing the attack to anxiety and depression.
“Not a day goes by that I don’t seriously regret all those things that I did. I was a very, very lost, very empty person,” Koppenhaver told the Las Vegas court.
“And to top it off, something’s not right with my head. Plain and simple.”
Yeah, it’s called being mixed race.
It causes psychological problems, which obviously you do have, which I can see simply from your hipster tattoos.
Also, anyone who has seen interviews with you knows you are completely unhinged and insane.
Obviously, you deserve to be in prison AT LEAST just for being the person that you are.
HOWEVER – in this specific case, you did not do anything wrong.
Ms Mack met Koppenhaver in 2013 when she was a well-known porn actress. Koppenhaver had also worked occasionally in the industry. But their relationship soon deteriorated, with Ms Mack accusing the wrestler of becoming abusive.
“I do know when he gets out, he will kill me,” she said.
Koppenhaver, 35, will only be considered for parole after 36 years in jail. The wrestler won 14 of his 19 mixed martial arts fights.
He was convicted on 29 counts including kidnap and attempted rape. The jury was unable to agree on two counts of attempted murder.
Okay so this is the bitch.
You’re going to tell me she didn’t deserve to have the shit beat out of her?
Are you insane?
Also, although War Machine definitely is insane, he is also sort of a respectable type of insane.
Like, he had this meme about how anyone should be able to murder anyone at any time if they were capable of it. It was his main point. He talked about “in this day and age there is laws protecting the weak” – that is a quote. That he said a lot.
Like he wanted literal Conanism.
He took the philosophical position that anyone should be able to murder anyone at any time.
He also did things like call for the assassination of Barack Obama and said that men in modern feminist societies are treated worse than Jews during the Holocaust.
He has also said many other things that some people might consider to be awesome.
Here, you can watch him on the Joe Rogan Experience to understand what is going on with this guy.
ALSO he was a really good fighter.
In the GOLDEN AGE of UFC.
Point being: I’m writing him a letter and offering to publish a weekly column – “War Machine’s Advice for Men.”