The Lord of the Rings was Secretly Filled with Trannies

If you saw a headline “Lord of the Rings Something Something Trannies,” you’d probably think “they’re adding trannies to The Lord of the Rings.”

In fact, they don’t have to add them – they were there all along!

You just didn’t notice them, because you were too bigoted!

New York Post:

This year’s annual Tolkien Society seminar will pay “more critical attention than ever” to diversity issues, according to an announcement by the literary charity.

Academics and non-academics alike interested in J.R.R. Tolkien’s high-fantasy world will read papers at the conference next week with titles such as “Gondor in Transition: A Brief Introduction to Transgender Realities in The Lord of the Rings” and “Pardoning Saruman?: The Queer in Tolkien’s The Lord of the Rings.”

The organization, founded in 1969, exists to promote the life and work of Tolkien, the English Catholic writer of epics set in Middle-earth.

“Tolkien’s efforts to represent (or ignore) particular characteristics requires further examination,” the organizers wrote.

The conference will be held virtually on Zoom on July 3 and 4.

“Spurred by recent interpretations of Tolkien’s creations and the cast list of the upcoming Amazon show The Lord of the Rings, it is crucial we discuss the theme of diversity in relation to Tolkien,” the organizers wrote.

An organization that has existed since 1969 to discuss classic children’s fantasy literature is now taken over by trannies.

This is worse than the birdwatchers being taken over by brown people.

The basic lesson is that you just can’t let women into organizations that were designed for men.

And yes, they’re talking about the new Amazon series – they want trannies in that, no doubt.

It’s probably going to get much weirder than that – race warriors who have infiltrated Dungeons & Dragons have already established that orcs are fantasy stand-ins for black people. So Amazon’s LotR is probably going to need to feature some orc males getting sexy with some elf females, as is the custom.