Superman Goes Anal in New Children’s Picture Book

I’m glad that someone is willing to teach our children about anal sex with men.

Relax – this is completely normal and good.


DC Comics’ Superman is now bisexual, and a forthcoming issue features a romantic encounter between the Man of Steel and a male reporter. The superhero’s woke makeover has caused some controversy, to say the least.

Jon Kent, son of Clark Kent and Lois Lane, is a thoroughly modern superhero. He fights climate change and school shootings, and uses his superpowers to stop the deportation of illegal immigrants. Now, in the latest issue of ‘Superman: Son of Kal-El’, he comes out as bisexual, with the comic’s pages depicting a kiss between the Man of Steel and Jay Nakamura, a reporter.

“Superman’s symbol has always stood for hope, for truth, and for justice,” writer Tom Taylor said in a statement on Monday. “Today, that symbol represents something more. Today, more people can see themselves in the most powerful superhero in comics.”

Created back in 1938, Superman was always the quintessential American hero: Strong, masculine, and fighting for “truth, justice, and the American way.” However, DC Comics amended this catchphrase in July when Jon Kent’s story began in the first issue of ‘Superman: Son of Kal-El’, swapping his father’s original patriotic declaration for “Truth, justice, and a better world.”

By that stage, DC had already hired race activist Ta-Nehisi Coates to work on a race-swapped Superman movie (which has since lost its director, JJ Abrams), and changing Superman’s sexuality was a natural progression for Taylor, who told the New York Times that “the idea of replacing Clark Kent with another straight white savior felt like a missed opportunity.”

In the latest edition of Superman, Lex Luthor tricks Superman into using kryptonite anal beads, which causes him to develop an immune disorder.

This is for children.