January 19, 2020
The deal is sealed.
There are officially no black people in the royal family.
The Duke and Duchess of Sussex will no longer use their HRH titles and will repay millions of pounds of taxpayers’ money spent refurbishing Frogmore Cottage as the price of a ‘Hard Megxit’ deal, it was dramatically announced last night.
Under the terms of the historic deal thrashed out at Sandringham yesterday, the pair, who will be known as Harry, Duke of Sussex and Meghan, Duchess of Sussex, will cease to be working members of the Royal Family from this spring and will not perform any official duties on behalf of the Queen – effectively leaving ‘The Firm’ completely.
The shock statement was announced by the Queen – but minutes later the couple sparked confusion when they updated their own website and signed off as ‘Their Royal Highnesses’.
The announcement by Kensington Palace marks the conclusion of talks about their future after days of wrangling with senior members of the family and royal aides to thrash out a deal.
But Harry and Meghan, who sources say intend to spend ‘the majority’ of their time in North America, will pay a heavy financial and emotional cost.
As well as returning the £2.4 million spent on a lavish refurbishment of Frogmore Cottage, they will pay a commercial rent – estimated at up to £360,000 a year – to retain it as their British home.
Prince Charles will continue to ‘offer private financial support’ and, crucially, the couple will have free rein to negotiate lucrative commercial deals that experts believe could net them hundreds of millions of pounds, although they have pledged ‘to uphold the values of Her Majesty’.
A number of unresolved issues remain, including whether Harry and Meghan will be required to strip the word ‘Royal’ from their SussexRoyal website, and who will pick up the multi-million pound bill for their continuing security requirements.
The Queen, who took control of the crisis that threatened to permanently damage the monarchy, praised Meghan for swiftly becoming a part of the family and thanked the couple for the work they had done, saying she was pleased they had found a constructive way to move forward.
It appears that Meghan got away with more cash than any woman since Jeff Bezos’ ex-wife – and she hasn’t even divorced Harry yet.
This money was gained on the threat that she would defame the entire royal family publicly as racist skin-haters if they didn’t pay up.
Who knows what kind of “lucrative commercial deals” they’re going to engage in. But every time the media mentions it, it sounds like underworld behavior.
But maybe Meghan can get on that spirit healing show with Gwyneth Paltrow.
Spirit healing is always a lucrative commercial deal.