Planet Mars Drying Up Because Not Enough Martians are Eating Bugs and Driving Teslas

Adrian Sol
Daily Stormer
January 13, 2020

Some people claim that the global warming on Mars is caused by Martians. Those people are known as racist rednecks – everyone knows that ALL global warming is caused by White people in Europe and America – including the global warming on other planets.

We all know the weather is really disastrous.

It’s like… hotter than usual. And there’s storms and stuff.

The polar caps are melting, erm, sometimes? Anyway, the polar bears are sad.

This is so sad.

Also, there’s now fires in Australia… Koalas are getting burnt.

RIP koalas.

All this is because of global warming climate change. A young child told me this on the telly.

Climate change is all because of White people driving SUVs and cooling their houses with air conditioning.

All that heat we’re pumping out of our apartments and office buildings has to be going somewhere, right? As it turns out, it’s going straight to Australia to burn up their koalas. Also, on Mars, evaporating their water.

Is there no limit to the crimes of the White man?


Once, Mars was a warm planet that could potentially support life and water on its surface. But something changed about 3.5 billion years ago and it lost most of its atmosphere.

Only a thin atmosphere exists today, allowing gases like water vapor to escape. And if water were to be on the surface now, it would instantly evaporate.

In the Martian upper atmosphere, sunlight breaks water molecules down into hydrogen and oxygen, which then pass from the thin atmosphere into space.

A new study published this week in the journal Science reveals that more water vapor is accumulating in the upper atmosphere of Mars, allowing more of it to escape into space. This means that Mars is losing water more quickly than anticipated.

Mars is becoming a dried out desert even faster than we can anticipate. The only explanation is CO2 or whatever. Either way, it’s obviously our fault somehow.

This is obviously a violation of the Martians’ civil rights.

Someone get the Martian Rights Alliance on the case.

We’re destroying other planets because of our irresponsible habits, and it’s time someone did something about it.

Researchers used data from the Atmospheric Chemistry Suite on the ExoMars Trace Gas Orbiter, which is operated by the European Space Agency and Roscosmos, Russia’s space agency.

The accumulation of unprecedented amounts of water vapor is occurring about 50 miles up from the Martian surface. The orbiter revealed that parts of the atmosphere actually act like pockets, reaching supersaturated level. These pockets contain anywhere between 10 to a hundred times more water vapor than the atmospheric temperature should allow.

During the planet’s warmer seasons, the water vapor loss is even greater. Dust storms also occur during the warm seasons, contributing to the loss of water vapor.

The loss of water vapor, which likely contributed to the shift from a warm, wet planet to a cold desert billions of years ago, “controls the rate of the planet’s continued desiccation” according to the researchers.

Overall, the majority of Mars’ water is locked up in its polar ice caps. Water vapor and clouds only represent a tiny fraction of the planet’s water.

And a recent study in the journal Geophysical Research Letters shows a map of water ice that could be just an inch beneath the dusty surface.

Data from NASA’s Mars Reconnaissance Orbiter and the Mars Odyssey Orbiter have also been able to detect the signature of water ice beneath the surface.

“You wouldn’t need a backhoe to dig up this ice. You could use a shovel,” said Sylvain Piqueux, study author at NASA’s Jet Propulsion Laboratory. “We’re continuing to collect data on buried ice on Mars, zeroing in on the best places for astronauts to land.”

Water exists on Mars in the form of ice beneath the surface, both at the poles and the planet’s mid-latitudes. The polar ice is the most well-known because the orbiters have imaged it. Meteors even helped increase understanding of the polar ice because they impact it, allowing the orbiter to take pictures of the disturbed ice.

All jokes aside, it seems that Mars is becoming more and more arid as time going on. This means it’ll presumably be even harder to colonize the red planet later on when there’s even less water around for us to use as a source of fuel and oxygen.

We’d better get our crap together quick and stop wasting all our money on brown people, or else we’ll miss the Mars terraforming and colonizing bandwagon altogether.

And this is definitely not something we want to miss.

Or is it? I’m getting some weird Mars colony flashbacks here.

This rings a bell…

Huh… This was on Mars too…

Wait, this was a good movie, wasn’t it?

Oh, damn, I’ve been trying to forget this scene.

Okay, so Mars isn’t all sunshine and roses.

But still, it’s pretty cool. It’s definitely more exciting and interesting than whatever it is we’ve got going on here, I can tell you that.

In any case, we’ve driven too many SUVs on earth now and it’s ruined anyway. Time to ditch this planet and go for greener pastures – Mars.

Elon can get it done. As long as he goes easy on the weed, he can get it done.