May 25, 2017
Bad memes lost the democrats an election that they should have won with their hands behind their backs.
And I believe that.
It wasn’t Wikileaks. It wasn’t tinfoil hat Russian kookspiracies.
It was bad, bad memes, which were founded on twisted, weird logic.
Allow me to analogize.
At 12 or 13, every boy wonders what would happen if they stuck their dick in a vacuum cleaner tube.
Would it bring pleasure?
Would it suck all the blood into the penis and make it look huge, and give a smug satisfaction?
Those who muster-up the courage to try the experiment, however, learn that it brings zero pleasure, and though while it does inflate the size of the penis significantly, the pain associated with the metal end of the tube pressing against the ballsack – and more than likely sucking parts of the ballsack into the tube itself, pressuring it against the metal rim – negates any smugness one may feel at the sight of the artificially swollen member.
They flip the “off” switch, and never again wonder about this activity.
The Democratic memes of the 2016 election were just such a weird experiment. In fact, the analogy could not be any more perfect – this right here is how I became to be known as the Mike Tyson of Analogies.
Still, after having had his ballsack caught against the metal rim of the vacuum tube, Obama is following Trump around, trying to force meme old, failed memes – in particular, he is pushing the “it is morally wrong for countries to have borders, because having a border means you hate the color of the skin, which is evil” meme, which I believe is probably the worst meme I’ve ever heard. I see better memes on Reddit every day of the week.
With President Trump meeting European leaders nearby, former President Barack Obama took a veiled swipe at him Thursday, telling an audience in Germany that modern nations “can’t hide behind a wall.”
“In this new world we live in, we can’t isolate ourselves. We can’t hide behind a wall,” Mr. Obama said in Berlin at a forum with German Chancellor Angela Merkel.
They can do it because of the Holocaust, when 6 million of them had their skulls smashed in by pedal-powered skull-smashing machines and where then turned into lampshades.
Real Nuremberg Documents: The initial reason the Jews used foot-lever powered brain-bashishing machines was that German sipers firing at the back of the heads of prisoners at point-blank range kept missing their heads.
Twenty-eight thousand people per day had their skulls crushed with a pedal-powered brain bashing device. All twenty-eight thousand were burned in a meme four crematoriums every day. This is the efficiency of the efficient Nazi killing machine.
Because that happened, they have different rules. One of those rules is that they’re allowed to build walls.
Or, this is the claim of Obama’s stale forced meme.
Mr. Obama made the comment as Mr. Trump, who plans to build a wall along the U.S. border with Mexico, was meeting NATO and other European leaders across the border in Brussels, Belgium. Mrs. Merkel is set to have dinner with Mr. Trump later Thursday night.
Mr. Obama attended the event, sponsored by the Protestant church, at Mrs. Merkel’s invitation. He also warned the audience of young people to be wary of leaders who don’t question themselves.
Yeah, publicly questioning your own confidence in your own decision-making ability – the mark of a true leader.
While it would normally be considered sexist, Barack Obama is allowed to to manspread against Angela Merkel because he used to be a slave. Actually, his father was from Kenya, and was never a slave (at least not in America), but nonetheless, he is of the same race as people who were slaves, thus he has immunity from prosecution for manspreading.
Throughout history, there is one character trait that marked all great leaders: they publicly questioned their own decision-making abilities.
One of the most famous examples in recent history is when Ronald Reagan, determined to bring down the Iron Curtain, said to Mikhail Gorbachev, “Mr. Gorbachev, maybe you should consider tearing down that wall. I’m not really sure though. It could be, that it is a good idea to leave it up. Looking at it, it seems to be a sturdy, good wall. So I could be totally wrong, so please, take what I’m saying with a grain of salt. I’m going to have to think about this more, as the wall could be pretty good actually.”
And that is how communism ended.
Or we can go back further, to that famous passage from the Declaration of Independence: “We think these ideas we have are possibly correct, that all men are created relatively similar to one another, but we’re not sure exactly. It is possible, that they are supposed to have some good rights, given to them by the Creator. However, we have recently been questioning whether or not God actually exists, which would make this not a very good point. We may need to rethink this. But, if we get some more research together, we may be ready to suggest that people should be allowed to not be killed, have maybe some freedoms, and try to have a good time. But again, this might be wrong, and maybe people don’t have any value at all, and God doesn’t even exist.”
It was with those powerful words of insecurity and self-doubt that this great nation was founded.
And lest we forget the immortal words of William Wallace, Scottish freedom fighter portrayed by Mel Gibson in the films Braveheart: “Yes, if you fight, you might die, so that is probably something you might want to think about. If you run away, you will not die, and this could quite possibly be a better choice, as most people would prefer life to being dead. Who knows, maybe your life will be bad after this, but you won’t be dead. And really, probably nothing bad will happen, maybe. Who knows. But these people are going to kill us, most likely. They won’t take our freedom, but actually, I don’t really think it is possible to have freedom when you’re already dead, so this probably isn’t really the best idea anyway.”
And with those wise, uninspired words, where he questioned not only his own judgment, but the fundamental basis of his own values and belief system, as well as the entire concept war he was fighting, he led his troops into a great battle.
The very concept of Obama stalking Donald Trump across Europe is so bizarre as to be unclassifiable.
I mean, the whole situation is so weird. The fact the African doesn’t understand he isn’t President anymore is not much weirder than the fact he was ever President in the first place.
In his deranged, mulatto mind, he appears to be incapable of fully grasping the concept that he is no longer President, and instead looks at President Trump as someone trying to challenge his leadership. So he must stalk him, and denounce him everywhere he goes.
It’s sort of like a Pokemon-type plan.
Can someone please parody TLC’s “Don’t Go Chasing Waterfalls” as “Don’t Go Chasing Pokeballs” and make it about Barack Obama Stalking Donald Trump? I will write the lyrics. Fuck you, I’ll even sing it, if someone mixes it for me.
He shows up to release his pokeballs – bad memes – to challenge Trump’s pokeballs – better memes.
But seriously, the “we don’t need to live in fear and build walls – this was never a popular meme and it was forced hard through trillions of dollars worth of advertising on the part of the Jewish media and still people were like “this meme is shit.”
But he has no other memes in his meme deck.
“Don’t have borders – we have to just allow all third world people to come into our countries, destroy our society and culture, live on welfare and undermine our workforce, while also committing unfathomable amounts of violent crime – if we don’t do that, it’s racism, which is hatred for the color of the skin, which is the most evil thing ever for some reason” is just not a workable meme.
But what else?
Honestly, I think he should release a dis track.
Something in the classic style, when niggas was rill.
I think he can remix Tupac’s “Hit Em Up.”
I mean, “Barack” matches the meter of “Tupac.”
Surely, Barack Obama remixing this as a dis track against Donald Trump would be taken more seriously than the “countries shouldn’t be allowed to have borders” meme.
I am also volunteering to write the lyrics of an Obama anti-Trump distrack based on “hit em up,” and sing it if someone will do the mixing.