July 23, 2017
Jews have tried to meme cuckoldry as a tool to degrade white masculinity for decades, but the Alt-Right has managed to appropriate it as a rhetorical weapon against our enemies. Could Fascists and racists now be protesting miscegenation through counter-cuckoldry?
NBA player Mike Conley – who is getting paid $153 dollars a year to dunk a basketball – is in the headlines as rumors swirl that he has been cucked. One theory proposes that the culprit may be a blonde haired, blue eyed Neo-Nazi who disagrees with his interracial marriage to Mary Peluso, so he chose to protest Loving v. Virginia by seducing her.
Eye color is understood by genetic scientists to be an inherited trait that is highly predictable, and neither Peluso or Conley have blue eyes. As a Negro, it is unlikely that Conley has recessive blue-eyed genes, which reduces the possibility of the pair having a fair-haired, blue-eyed child to <1%.
Additionally, the child lacks other dominant Negro traits like nappy hair, big lips, etc. Conley is by no means a “light-skinned” black man either.
Somehow, he hasn’t gotten a paternity test. In fact, he’s doubling down.
Last summer, Grizzlies point guard Mike Conley Jr. signed a herculean contract worth $153 million. It made the 29-year-old Conley the highest-paid player in NBA history.
Later in 2016, Conley had another monumental life moment: he and his wife had a baby boy, Myles Alex Conley.
The internet, however, recently saw a photo of Myles and had some questions. A number of people posited that the boy couldn’t be Conley’s because he was “too white.”
Conley had a great sense of humor about it, though. He said the blue eyes run in the family, writing “I’m NOT that nice” in the caption of his response on Instagram. He even included a Maury photo and a video of him hitting the Shmoney.
Usually the type of white women that sleep with affletes are morally inept gold-digging sluts, so it’s not crazy at all to question who that poor kid’s real father is.
Conley actually seems like a pretty nice guy. Dedicating part of his fortune to financing the 14 words through his wife’s son is a rare form of philanthropy for a black man.
But Mrs. Conley is also a delectable little brunette. If she swipes you on Tinder and Mike’s touring with his basketball team, don’t be afraid to go commando. Mike’s got your back.
Just make sure you pack some Penicillin.