November 26, 2016
Black Friday: the holy American tradition where the cosmic struggle is commemorated in a material struggle for trinkets.
So, a bunch of people got shot yesterday.
It’s unclear who is responsible, or what is the motive, but I would present the hypothesis that this is a wave of protest over the continuous violations of African-American civil rights, and a memorial to the suffering experienced during slavery.
And also, I guess, because “dat cracka’ done stole’d my parking space!”
At least four people were shot across the country during Black Friday sales, including a Walmart customer who died in a fight over a parking space.
Three separate shootings — at a New Jersey Macy’s, a Tennessee mall and a Nevada Walmart — killed two people and wounded two more. All the attacks happened outside of the stores as holiday shoppers inside loaded up on door busters and deals.
Demond Cottman, 20, was shot and killed around 1 a.m. in front of a mall in Mays Landing, CBS Philadelphia reported.
His brother, Shadi Cottman, was also injured when the shooting broke out at Hamilton Mall, in the parking lot next to the Macy’s store.
Huh, I wonder who could be responsible for these shootings…
Could it be a straight white male?
They have a culture or rape and murder.
Or maybe a rowdy Chinese accountant?
They live their lives like they’ve got nothing to lose.
In Reno, a Walmart shopper was shot and killed just minutes after Black Friday door busters began on Thursday night.
Police said the unidentified victim was gunned down at 6:05 p.m. in a driveway leading up to the superstore, KOLO TV reported. The gunman and his victim were fighting over a parking spot, officials said.
The shooter — described as a black man in a dark-colored Toyota, with damage to the side windows and brake lights — fled the scene.
No one ever expects the colored gentleman.
The problem with black Friday is that it concentrates a lot of people in very tight spaces. And when Blacks are concentrated in a given area, even for a short while, trouble tends to happen as a result.
So unless you’re looking to get shot over a parking space, I’d avoid going anywhere where there’s likely to be black people on black Friday next year.